Sincerely,: don't put out this fire.

Dear you,

I am more honest with you than I am with most anyone else.

And I need to be honest again.

I'm terrified.

I'm terrified I will not be enough someday.

I'm terrified the monster lurking beneath my breastbone some call a heart will change its mind.

I'm terrified my brain will continue its traitorous streak and I will ruin my own happiness.

I'm terrified someday while your fingers are tracing across my hips and ribs and thighs you will stop with a, "Sorry, I can't".

I'm terrified he'll come back and his stupid moths will rage up again and destroy the butterflies you give me.

I'm terrified someday one of my stories will be a step too far into crazy and you won't understand.

I'm terrified some twisted emotion will make me think all of this between us isn't enough.

I'm terrified

But mostly I think I'm terrified because I sleep better when you're here than when you're not.

And that has never happened before.

Sincerely,

Blue

Sincerely,